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What is Sexting? How to Make it Fun & Safe

by | Jun 20, 2023 | RELATIONSHIPS, SEXUALITY, Uncategorized

a woman looking up what is sexting then taking sexy photos for partner


In today’s digital age, with the the increased usage of cell phones and social media, technology has transformed various aspects of our lives, including the way we communicate and express our desires. Sexting, or the act of sending sexually explicit messages, photos, or videos, has become increasingly popular among adults in consensual relationships.

However, mastering the art of sexting requires finesse, trust, and respect. In this blog post, we’ll explore some essential tips and guidelines to help you navigate the exciting world of sexting with confidence and respect for your partner’s boundaries.


What is Sexting?


Sexting, which combines the words sex and texting, refers to the sending of nude photos, sexually explicit pictures, or videos to another person. Sexting can also include explicit text messages that are sexual in nature. Sexting tends to be most common amongst young adults, but older adults can certainly send or receive sexually explicit content as well. Sexting can have benefits, such as a means for long distance couples to engage in sexual activity from different locations or a way that people can spice up their sex life.


Sexting often gets a bad rap due to situations that can happen if someone abuses the trust and respect that should be an integral part of sexting. When engaging in digital sex acts such as sexting, it helps to have open communication, boundaries, concrete consent, and expectations for the sharing and receiving of explicit images, videos, and texts.


There are some tips and considerations to keep in mind in order to have fun with sexting, while still protecting yourself and creating safety.


How to Engage in Sexting: Maintaining Fun & Safety


Establish consent and communication


Consent is the cornerstone of any healthy sexual interaction, including sexting. Before engaging in sexting, it’s crucial to have an open and honest conversation with your partner. Discuss boundaries, comfort levels, and establish consent for this form of communication. Ensure that both parties are comfortable and enthusiastic about participating in sexting.

Choose the right platform


Selecting a secure and private platform is essential when it comes to sexting. Opt for encrypted messaging apps or platforms that offer end-to-end encryption to safeguard your intimate conversations. Popular choices include Signal, WhatsApp, or private messaging features within established dating apps.

Start with context and flirting


To set the mood, begin with some playful banter and flirtation. Build anticipation by creating a sensual atmosphere through words, compliments, or inside jokes. Focus on creating a connection and igniting the desire between you and your partner. Gradually transition into more explicit content as the conversation progresses.

Respect boundaries


Respecting your partner’s boundaries is paramount in sexting. Pay close attention to their comfort levels and the pace at which they’re willing to engage. Remember, consent can be withdrawn at any time, and it’s crucial to honor your partner’s choices. Open communication and mutual respect are essential to ensuring a positive sexting experience for both parties.

Be creative and descriptive


Sexting allows you to explore your imagination and create vivid mental images for your partner. Use descriptive language to convey your desires, fantasies, and intentions. Paint a captivating picture with your words, focusing on sensory details, such as touch, taste, and scent. Encourage your partner to do the same, fostering a mutual exchange of fantasies and desires.

Incorporate multiple forms of media


While words can be incredibly arousing, including multiple types of media elements can enhance the experience. Share intimate photos, videos, or voice recordings if both parties are comfortable with this level of engagement. However, exercise caution and ensure the content remains intact, respectful, and never compromising or non consensual.

Consider timing and privacy


Timing is crucial when engaging in sexting. Ensure that your partner is in a private and comfortable environment to receive and respond to your messages. Avoid sending explicit content without prior consent or during inappropriate situations, such as work hours or social gatherings. Respect your partner’s privacy and remind them to do the same by avoiding screenshots or sharing the intimate content without explicit permission.

Take it slow and enjoy the process


Sexting is an intimate and exciting way to connect with your partner. Embrace the journey and take your time to savor each interaction. Focus on building anticipation, exploring fantasies, and discovering each other’s desires. Remember, it’s not just about the end result but the connection and pleasure you derive from the process.


Sexting, when done consensually and with respect, can be a powerful tool for intimacy and sexual expression within a relationship. By establishing clear boundaries, maintaining open communication, and nurturing trust, you can embark on a thrilling adventure with your partner. Remember to prioritize consent, respect privacy, and enjoy the journey together, celebrating the unique bond you share. Happy sexting!

Modern Intimacy is a group therapy practice, founded by renowned Psychologist and Sex Therapist, Dr. Kate Balestrieri. This inclusive blog is designed to provide a wealth of information and resources for mental health, relationships, and sexuality. Subscribe today to get the latest information from our expert contributors from all around the world.


Author Bio

Rachel Overvoll is a Somatic Sex and Intimacy Coach at Modern Intimacy and author, living in Colorado. She works with clients to move beyond shame, step into safety in their bodies, and to live a life embodied in pleasure. Using her credentials from the Somatica Institute and Kinsey Institute, she works through the mediums of embodiment and self attunement to support clients as they step into the power of their authentic selves.



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