For many people, the holidays are an opportunity to spend time with and connect with loved ones. Whether you’re looking to deepen your romantic relationship(s), platonic relationships, or familial relationships, these gifts can help you get there. Here are some gift recommendations that will help you get curious about the people in your life and ultimately build a stronger connection.
Modern Intimacy is not earning revenue from this gift guide. These are our recommendations.
Mirror of Intimacy
“Mirror of Intimacy is a daily reflection book on erotic and emotional intelligence. It can be a great tool for launching an erotic ritual in the new year. Take time each day or as you see fit to explore the topics and answer the accompanying questions. Developing deeper emotional and erotic intimacy can assist in creating the sex life you want. If you can find it, the hardcover edition of this book is a gem.” – Heather “Lulu” Mazzei, ASW
Talk, Flirt, Dare
“A fun and romantic game to engage in insightful, daring, or sexy conversation on your next date night.” – Imani Reynolds, AMFT
{The And} Couples Edition
“This game is designed to create deeper conversations by asking meaningful questions. What is excellent about the {The And} conversation cards is you can get different editions, including dating, couples, long-term relationships, friends, kids, strangers, and self. {The And} is a communication enhancer you can use with any relationship you want to strengthen.” – Brooke Brownlee, APCC
Where Should We Begin: A Game of Stories
“This card game is the ultimate intimacy enhancer! Creating opportunities for you to strengthen both platonic and romantic intimacy through conversation and stories.” – Rachel Overvoll, Somatic Sex Coach
Dating Cards
“Whether you are newly dating a new person or years into your relationship, it can be fun to build connections over learning new things about each other or having discussions that may not have occurred before. This fun card game serves as a great communication and connection enhancer for couples to get to know each other and connect a bit deeper.” – Kayla Tricaso, Office Manager & Patient Intake Specialist
This holiday season, you might consider connecting deeper with your loved ones by gifting one of these items designed to enhance communication.
Quick Tips to Improve Your Communication Skills
Effective communication skills are often learned. Many people don’t grow up with the best models for healthy communication and thus, they have to learn, oftentimes in adulthood. The importance of communication shouldn’t be undermined. Read on for a few key points on how you can communicate effectively with those in your life.
Practice Active Listening
Active listening is a type of communication technique that promotes really paying attention to what the person you’re talking to is saying. It might sound simple, but for many people, active listening doesn’t come naturally. If you are someone who struggles with interrupting or waiting for your turn to speak, it can be beneficial to give active listening a try and see how conversations become more meaningful and connective. Active listening is a great tool that can be useful in both personal and professional relationships.
Don’t Forget Nonverbal Cues
Nonverbal communication via reading facial expressions, body language, and eye contact can be just as important as verbal communication. When you speak face to face with someone, pay full attention to what you’re seeing in addition to what you’re fearing from them to enhance communication skills.
How are your written communication skills?
In the highly digital world we live in, so much of the communicating we do happens electronically, whether it’s email, texting, or even written letters. Written communication skills are beneficial for personal relationships, but also have the ability to improve communication skills in the workplace.
Step away when triggered
When it comes to heated discussions or conflict, know when it’s time to stop or take a pause on a conversation that is escalating in emotion. It often doesn’t help to have emotion provoking conversation when you are feeling activated as words can more easily be thrown around that can’t be taken back. If you notice you are struggling to communicate without escalating in anger, take a step back and offer to resume or finish the conversation when you’ve had time to regulate.
Don’t assume
For those who struggle with communication, it can be easy to assume how someone feels rather than asking them. For example, if you are talking with your partner and feel they might be upset with you, instead of assuming. Ask your partner how they are feeling. They may be irritable due to lack of sleep or work stress. If they are upset with you, then it’s a good opportunity to tackle conflict head on instead of avoiding.
People are not able to read your mind
Keep in mind that you and others are not mind readers so without proper communication, it can be hard to know exactly what one’s needs are and how to meet them. If you feel upset that your partner is not contributing their fair share of household chores, it’s beneficial to talk with them instead of hoping they will realize eventually that you need more help around the house.
Happy Holidays from Dr. Kate Balestrieri and the Modern Intimacy Team!
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